AFFLUENZA: The New Excuse For When Rich Kids Kill Innocent People!

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Lawyer’s for 16-year-old Ethan Couch were able to pawn off on a doe-eyed court that “affluenza” was to blame for his stealing beer at WalMart, getting wasted and then plowing his out of control Ford F-350 into a group of folks, killing four.

Affluenza? Please.

For those who’re not hip to “affluenza“, allow me to help you add another word to that ever growing list of PC terms spun by blame-shifting therapists in order to explain away criminal behavior by little Ethans who need to go to prison instead of a luxury rehab in Newport Beach:

Affluenza is a portmanteau of “affluence” and “influenza“It’s the malady of rich kids whose parents never let them suffer the consequences of their bad behavior. In my day we called them spoiled little bastards and the way we’d help them get healed from affluenza is by beating the crap out of them at school when mommy and daddy weren’t around.

According to a defense psychologist, this is what Ethan suffers from and we should feel sorry for this brat. Yep, these wizards postulated that little Ethan was unable to link his criminal/deadly behavior with its being bad due to his parents’ teaching him that wealth buys privilege. Therefore, to impart to him this hard lesson in reality, his parents hired out an expensive law firm that successfully convinced a court that numb-nuts needed rehab versus jail. Wow. Way to go. Lesson learned.
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