The delivery person

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As a culture, we are very busy and excessively lazy! We outsource raising our children to nannies and iPads, thinking to smart phones, and cooking to fast-food restaurants! With all the outsourcing that we do, I’m surprised that we still remember how to reproduce.

In the old days, when it came to getting food, our ancestors used to hunt. This has also been replaced. This is a role that I think many of us take for granted, the delivery person. Think about it, is it raining hard? Let’s order chinese food. Is it freezing cold? Let’s get a pie! It’s too hot to be outside, let’s order some wings! Without fail, you place the order, and it magically makes its way to your door. Except it is not magic. It’s the delivery person.


This person has the weight of the world on his or her shoulders. They have to get the food to you on time, while navigating all sorts of terrain and neighborhoods. They have to avoid robberies, and all sorts of other obstacles. In addition to all that they also have to make sure the food is still hot or cold when it arrives, and that you receive all of your utensils. God forbid that you actually have to wash a fork! Blasphemy!

These people do this for what most of us would consider chump change, but they do it. I don’t think they do it for the love, or the passion, but because they have to. It’s a job, just like our lazy asses, they to have to put food on the table.

So the next time you are missing a spork, think twice before stiffing the delivery person. Remember, they are doing the job that our ancestors would do themselves for us, and more efficiently than they ever did. Even if the company charges a service or delivery charge, make sure to tip the delivery person a few bucks! You cheap bastids!



Note the date on a post as it may be an old point of view. If you learn that your views are wrong, yet they remain the same, then you are a fool.

The opinions and views expressed are solely those of the author.

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