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There are many different types of parents out there, in this post, I’ll cover some of the few types that I have observed over my lifetime. This that I am sharing here doesn’t come from some parenting journal, there are no stats and figures, this is real-life experience talking. Sure I can go and read some medical journal on all this crap, but that’s not my purpose with this column. I’d rather just casually talk with you guys about what I see in the real world, not what some book with a bunch of bs statistics tells us. Granted, those journals have a place for sure, and I have read them as well, but for this article, they won’t be factoring in much.
The “Ready from the gate” parent!
This person was born to be a parent. They knew from a very young age that they wanted children. They knew the sexes they wanted the kids to be, the years apart, and exactly down to the minute when each child would be born. These people are all about kids, the first thing they do when they buy or search for a new house is figure out where the nursery is going to be. They may not have a husband/wife; they may not have a job, education, or a place to live, but doggone it these folks know what they want to do when it comes to having kids.
The “I am God” parent!!!
Some people believe in parenting with an iron fist! These are those parents who believe that their word is the final and only word! The child MUST do what these parents say regardless of how they feel about it! An example of this is that parent who forces their child to play piano, even though the kid hates piano. This parent may physically beat or emotionally torment this child if they catch them expressing interest in guitars or something unrelated to the piano. If you have never read “Two kinds” by Amy Tan, this would be a good place to start and learn about these types of parents.
The “absentee” parent.
The absentee parent, this parent comes in various flavors. One example would be the parent who is never around because they are married to their work. Meetings, late nights and frequent travel keep this parent away from their children.
The other example is the deadbeat. This is that man/woman who had a child, but simply is not there for them. Sadly, in this society we encounter these quite often. Mostly, they are men, and you can find them at the child support hearing in family court.
The “no consequence” parent.
This is one of the worst types of parents. Those that do not teach their children that there are consequences to their actions in life. These are those kids who do terrible things, then the parents attempt to hug the bad out of them. “Oh Johnny, I know you didn’t mean to drown the neighbor’s hamster, that’s just not very nice, Johnny.” Ridiculous people that live in a fantasy land type of place. A perfect example of this one would be Ethan Couch and how he was set free because of affluenza. Simply not being taught that killing people is wrong. Give me a freaking break.
The “child” parent.
This parent had a kid while they themselves were still a kid. This is also a very common occurrence in our neighborhoods here in NYC. MTV saw fit to create a show about teens getting pregnant and having kids. This was one of those things that was happening when I was young, and is still happening to this day. Back in junior high school I wrote a poem entitled “Teen Pregnancy.” I can’t remember it all, but I recall “There is a problem, affecting us all, kids having kids, while they are still young and small.”
The child abuser.
This parent comes in all different colors, shapes and sizes. One could say this is a variation of the God parent, but they are worst. These people beat and mistreat their children for the slightest infraction. You see these animals on the train from time to time, screaming and mistreating their children. It’s wrong, and I don’t support it one bit! Keep in mind, this need not only be physical, it can be mental or emotional.
I recall when I was at my son’s parent/teacher night, one of the instructors was explaining to some parents, “Your child is doing great; he a perfect 100 average.” The father immediately says, “What is he doing bad at? Where is he lacking? Does he need extra work or more The teacher then mentions once again the perfect score. After a few moments, I couldn’t take any more of this. I went over to the man and told him to stop searching for flaws and to let the kid enjoy his perfect score. Instead of berating him, searching for flaws, why not celebrate and reward the success? I then proceeded to tell the guy to buy his son a PS4 and shut up. I don’t think he liked me very much.Ugh, what a tool that guy was!
These are just a few of the styles I’ve seen in my life. There are many, many more, spanning from one extreme to the other. Covering every single variation would be a very time consuming endeavor. Let it suffice to say that I have not even begun to scratch the surface.
Please share with us the different styles that you have observed in your lifetime. What style do you use and why? We’d love to hear, please sound off in the comments section!
Growing Up Bronx