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I sometimes ask myself, why is sex so important to men? ESPECIALLY to us men. So before some of y’all start going in on me about how sex is not the only thing in a relationship, I’ll say that I agree with you. Sex, is not the only thing in a relationship, but it is an important part of the relationship.
Communication, appreciation, affection, honesty, intimacy, these things are all important factors to a successful relationship. When something is missing, it hurts the relationship. But the same can be said for sex, if it’s missing, it hurts the relationship.
I think that men in particular, and according to many of my female friends, including an ex who used to threaten to cheat on me over my lack of sexual interest in her, sex is just as important to women too! Though, it is my belief that it ranks higher in level of importance and urgency to us men.
It is animal in nature, is it not? I don’t recall ever making a conscious decision to want sex. I just woke up one day, and I wanted sex! Before I even knew what it really was, I just wanted it, and ever since that day of awakening, there was no turning back. I have wanted sex since that day, everyday, and unless I am hit by some sort of freak accident that messes up my internal wiring, I think that I will want sex until the day that I die.
My father, rest his soul, is a perfect example of this desire for sex. My pops passed away at 73 years old, and until the day he died, he always wanted sex. Yo, my pops had two ladies by his side during his last days. His main lady, whom he really loved, wasn’t down with sex before marriage, she was a very religious person, and my pops, he wasn’t hearing that marriage stuff at his age. So, he did what probably every male reading this would do, he started messing around.
Now, I know that in our culture, that is pretty messed up to do, but at the same time, I can’t help but be impressed that this 73 year old man was able to have two humans damn near wrestling over him on his death bed. Now, messed up as it is, that’s a true player for life! Literally, till death! Regardless of your thoughts about what he did, you gotta acknowledge that my pops was definitely something else.
Recently, my little sister said to me, “You are your father’s son.” Now this was on a completely unrelated matter, (I was imitating old school Spanish speakers) but the reality is just that; I am indeed my father’s son. My behavior at this point in time is not the same as his, but it has been in the past, and given the proper circumstances, it could just as easily be again.
Remember, we make choices, conscious choices. We choose to be loyal, we choose to honor our partners, but that is not in our nature. It is in our nature to conquer, to seduce, to want lots of sex whenever and wherever we can get it.
Of course, most of us civilized folk don’t act on these carnal desires, but make no mistake, they are there. Nowadays, there are so many variables to consider, loyalty, disease, conflict, pregnancy, and so on. But our true nature and desire cannot be denied.
Some guys will read this and claim that this doesn’t apply to them. Hell, they might actually believe that, but it’s bull. The difference between me and them, is that I’m just honest about my nature. They are trying to fool you, and maybe even themselves into thinking that they are wired differently. Please, just stop, you are an animal just like the rest of us. You may not behave like one, but you are one just the same.
Granted, men are not the only ones who function this way. I know quite a few ladies who are also straight up playas from the Himalayas, but generally, I think that it is us. Feel free to correct me though.
So what’s the deal people? Why is sex so important to us? If we don’t get it, we have to consistently release the valve, if you know what I mean. And eventually, if we don’t get it at home, long enough, we will falter and land inside of someone else. Why?
Empires have fallen because of men and their desire for sex. I’m nearly 40 years old, and at this age, there is absolutely zero difference in the level of desire that I have for sex than when I was 21 years old. Absolutely zero difference! The only difference is that now I have more control and discipline, and I may require additional recovery time. Haha.. Yet, the actual psychological desire remains the same.
Why are we wired this way? I know there is science to it, but it is truly fascinating to me. Does it solely come down to animal instincts? It is not my desire to procreate, but the act of sex itself, that is what I love. So is it just the pleasure? Or are we hard wired to want to reproduce, and as such it is attached to such great pleasure?
Anyone out there know? Why is sex so important?
Growing Up Bronx