I had just finished training at the gym and was on my way home. A man cut off my path and tried to intimidate me physically. He came into my personal space and said, “Hey man, give me some money and you can go!” He was close enough that I could have easily taken him down if necessary. He was a big guy, but I noticed the smell of alcohol on his breath and a wild look in his eyes. Despite his size, I didn’t feel genuinely threatened, so I took control of his arms and told him to stop, back up, and calm down. I wanted to avoid escalating things unless absolutely necessary.
He kept trying to post up and intimidate me, but after a few unsuccessful attempts to free himself, he realized I could easily control him and temporarily backed down. When I released him, he squared up again, preparing to swing, but I quickly took control of his arms once more.
He read my shirt aloud and said, “Everything hurts, huh?” I replied, “You’re going to end up feeling like my shirt if you don’t relax and stop testing me.” We repeated this catch-and-release a few times, then he stopped and I gently pushed him back to create some distance. He then said, “I’m right here, thanks for hanging out with us.” After that, he went to sit down with two other men who were nearby. I know one of them, but he wasn’t involved as he seemed very impaired. I said, “Have a good night, guys.” I overheard him say, “That guy is strong.” I replied, “Thanks, I appreciate that.”
Be careful out there. NYC can be unpredictable. I stayed calm, aware of my surroundings, and handled the situation in a safe and non-aggressive way. I used just enough control to show he would be at a disadvantage if things escalated, but I didn’t cause him harm. I believe he was intoxicated given the smell of alcohol, though he seemed relatively coherent. I de-escalated what could have become a much worse situation. I’m glad I avoided serious escalation and kept things under control. Fortunately, he listened and calmed down before things got out of hand.
Even at my current long-time white belt level, I fully credit my martial arts training for how I handled this. To me, it’s no big deal to control another person trying to impose their will. Being physical in close quarters is something we train for regularly.
During the encounter, I remained perfectly calm. I think the man understood that as well. He didn’t have an easy target, and I wasn’t scared. After I walked away, the anxiety and nerves set in as I realized what might have happened. Still, I’m proud I didn’t lose control or panic, and that I used the appropriate level of force to gain control safely.
My advice to all of you is to get some real live training. By “live,” I mean arts like BJJ, wrestling, kickboxing, boxing, Sambo, Judo, or Muay Thai, styles where you spar against resisting opponents. These teach you how to handle situations confidently because you’re working hard to survive every time you train. Other arts that don’t involve live sparring don’t prepare you as well for the stress and demands of real confrontations.
Stay safe out there.