I once dated a woman who was very difficult to be with, and later in our relationship, she became violent and even tried to stab me with a knife when I wanted to visit my son.

The relationship didn’t start well. On one of our first dates, I left her at a restaurant because I thought she was being difficult and rude. Early on, she snapped at me because I brought condoms and made them visible. She said I was acting as if sex was guaranteed. I understand her point on that — I realize it was in poor taste and never did that again. My intention was simply to show that I wanted us to be safe if we were intimate, but I get how that came across the wrong way.

The way I left that relationship was as abrupt as it started. There were many signs we weren’t good for each other. For example, she said since I spent so much time at her place, I should start chipping in with rent. I replied that if I was going to pay rent, then I was moving in permanently. She said okay and told me to move in then and chip in. Clearly, that is not a healthy way to make such a major decision.

There were some good times, though. We traveled a lot and spent time with friends. I especially enjoyed a trip we took to California; visiting San Francisco was one of the best experiences of my life.

But things ended suddenly. After she assaulted me, I knew it was time to leave. I was concerned that if things escalated further, the situation could become more dangerous or be mishandled. She was either going to harm me seriously or things could spiral in an unpredictable direction.

So, I waited until she went to work, quietly looked at apartments, and found one I really liked. I lived there alone for several years and loved the place.

While she was at work, I signed a lease and moved out. She was furious, called me a coward, and eventually wanted to talk. She came to the area where I moved and talked with me on the phone for a while, then went back home. I don’t think we met in person after that, and I don’t believe she came over.

Later, when I went to collect my remaining belongings, I found everything I owned as well as many gifts I had given her had been damaged. She said she was angry and that’s what happened. I discarded it all. I did enjoy being with her, though even that became stressful. Before leaving, I tried one last time for a goodbye, but she said, “You had your chance.” I nodded and left, and that was the end of that difficult relationship.