Helping a Veteran in More Ways Than One: A Story of Connection and Compassion

A few days ago I was in the city to eat with my son and my little sister. Afterwards, I got a strong urge to find a bathroom. So my son and I started walking towards one of the 24 Hour Fitness gyms in Midtown. When we had exited Blue Smoke, we saw one of our servers and a gentleman speaking. I nodded at both of them and kept walking.

As we walked toward the avenue to head to the gym, I heard someone calling out, “Veteran, Hey Veteran!” I looked and saw it was the gentleman speaking with our server. He flagged me down and said, “I’m a veteran too, man. I’m trying to get a few dollars together to get a room and a shower at a hostel. It’s hot out here and I’m feeling rough. Can you help a fellow veteran out?”

To show me he was serious, he pulled out a VA card from his pocket. I decided to cover the full cost of the hostel. He thanked me and seemed grateful, but he also said, “Hey man, I don’t want you to feel sorry for me. I’m just going through a rough patch, I’m a hard-working man.” Sensing that his pride was affected by having to ask for help, and knowing how many veterans struggle daily, I decided to spend some time talking with him.

My son and I both needed to use the restroom, but I stayed and had a conversation with him for a while. I asked questions I already knew the answers to because I wanted him to feel like he was contributing, like he was helping me somehow. Maybe if he felt useful, it would help with his own sense of worth. I’m not sure, but I hoped it would lift his spirits.

We talked about the VA, getting a VA card, and the medical benefits they offer. At the end, we shook hands and went our separate ways. It might not sound like a big deal, but I want to believe that by letting him contribute, he felt like he accomplished something and maybe felt a little better about himself.

When we left, my son asked why I had talked so long about something I didn’t actually need to know. I told him I wasn’t sure if I did the right thing, but my goal was to remind a man feeling down that he has worth. You and I know he does, but I wonder if he knows it himself. I wanted to spend a few minutes to remind him of that. I hope I succeeded.

None of us are perfect, and I’ll be honest: earlier that day I walked past a man with a cardboard sign that said “Veteran.” I nodded at him but didn’t do anything else. I felt a bit guilty about that, and it seems like the universe gave me a chance to make things right. I hope I did.