One of my neighbors is an amazing, friendly, kind, (I think from out of town) white male. He has an amazing positive vibe and energy, just an all-around nice guy. We happen to live in a neighborhood that is generally a relatively nice and safe place in the Queens county area. This should give you some perspective as to what is to follow.
This morning he said to me, “Angel, this is going to sound a bit weird, but I was doing laundry and walked away for a few minutes, when I came back my almost full very big jug of laundry detergent was gone. Isn’t that weird? Has that ever happened to you in this building? I’m so surprised.”
My response to that statement contained no surprise whatsoever. “That’s not weird to me at all, man, this is NYC.” I told him that I grew up in the South Bronx, so I never leave any of my valuables unattended; I’m conditioned to guard my things. Even a jug of laundry detergent, which is actually expensive. I do sometimes leave softener sheets, but I hide them. I said to him, “the way I see it, I never give them a chance to take my items.”
You never know who’s around you, who lives in your building, who they are or what their intentions might be. We live in a relatively safer place for sure, but you never know who’s around, so it’s always wise to err on the side of caution.
This applies broadly, not just when it comes to theft. The old man being nice to my son by giving him a coloring book? It’s important to stay aware and cautious. The guy being nice to my wife? It’s wise to keep awareness high in many situations. I am kind and sociable, I’m not saying everyone has bad intentions, but keeping your wits about you and always staying aware is important.
In my world, I am always attentive, so I guard my space, our food, and my family as fiercely as I ever have. I never let my guard down. The worst mistake you could make about me is to think that my current neighborhood and lifestyle have made me soft or that I’ve forgotten the lessons from my past. I don’t live that lifestyle anymore, but the awareness and instincts developed over years of experience will always be a part of me until the day I die. You don’t just forget years and years of experience. You always remember. So I will always live with a healthy amount of caution.
I grew up in a rough neighborhood during an era when your sneakers could get stolen right off of your feet, your hat taken off your head, a coat, headphones, even the Lee patch on your jeans was fair game for thieves.
Given my life experience, as far as I am concerned, if I leave anything out, I’m tempting someone to take it from me. This is also part of the reason why I never wear jewelry. DMX said it best:
Who you really think give a freak how much your watch cost? (mm-hmm)
How much your watch cost? You bout to get your watch lost (aight)
If you flashin it, you must not want it
See I freak with real brothers that done it
You know what time it is, run it!
After our brief elevator conversation my neighbor said to me,
That’s a great point, never give them a chance.
I’d like to think one of the staff stored it for him or something like that? Maybe? It’s possible, but if someone is still doing laundry and clothes are washing, then why would a staff member assume that they forgot it? That Tide got whisked away. (Get it? Laundry humor.)
In any case, my neighbor seems to have taken away the main point of our conversation: “Don’t give them a chance to take your things.” I feel a bit sorry for him, he’s a good guy and believes that people are inherently good, and though he may be right, it’s a fact that the world sometimes requires us to approach these situations with caution and awareness.
Leaving your things unattended, expect that it might be gone once you leave your glance to it. It's not about negative thinking but taking any possibility, right?