Due to some complications in life, my son moved in full time with me and wife around August. He’s stayed in his room and has basically gone about his life pretty much the same. Except for a very long and inconvenient commute to Brooklyn for work which we hope to remedy soon enough.
In any case, my son is somewhat tired of living by the rules of other people, something that I can understand and empathize with. By the time I was his age, I was already living on my own for about a year. Basically for the same reasons, I like my space and I like doing things my own way. Mind you, even now, living with my son and being married, I encounter difficulties with sharing space. I think it is only human.
As a father, I’m excited and happy for my son. There is nothing like the feeling of having your own place, everything the way you like it, and basically living by the rules you set as the head of your household. I think it is a great thing to live on your own for a while prior to settling down and getting married and stuff. Experience your own space for a while.
So yes, I’m happy for him, but I’m also scared because he’s going out into the world on his own. Granted, he’ll only be two stops away on the train. This is good because we are very close to each other should a necessity arise. However, I still feel a sense of panic and dread at the thought of my son not coming home where I can see him arrive safely and know he’s good. We’ll obviously be in touch, but just not knowing he’s home safe every night gives me a sense of panic and chaos in my head. Now I know how my Mama Bear felt all those years ago. Sorry I didn’t check in that much at first Mom.
He’s moving into a really nice area. A really, really nice and very exclusive area. We were pretty happy to land the place and we did all that was necessary to ensure it went to him. I am even a guarantor for him since it is his first place and the landlord wanted some protection. I get that.
It is a small but cozy place and I think he will be comfortable and happy there. I’ve helped furnish it with a bigger bed and some other miscellaneous items that he needed as I don’t want my son to go broke and use up all his savings during this move. I’ve also spent hours and hours cleaning the place with him in a way that would make Mr. Clean envious! Finally, I’d never cosign as a guarantor for anyone, I’ve been burned badly before. But hey, this is my son so exceptions are being made.
So yes, I’m happy to see my son moving on his own and becoming a responsible man. There is a part of me that feels bad because I think that our constant nagging him about cleaning up after himself may have contributed to push him in this direction, but I know that he will enjoy his new place and I have already emphasized time and time again, that if he needs me, I got his back.
This is a weird time for my family. My son is moving out and my baby sister has seemingly relocated to Florida. Both of my babies have left the nest and are going out into the world on their own. It is scary, but I know full well that this is a part of life and they’ll be just fine. So as scared as I am, I embrace it and wish them all the good fortune in the world.
Just a life long New Yorker sharing the journey through my lens. Please take note of a post’s date. The views I express here are subject to change and evolving as I grow and learn.
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