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I had my first real major “fan girl” experience recently. This woman was super happy and very excited that she could talk to me online! Me? Yup, me! After seeing me on the television show “Cook your ass off,” I made a new television fan! She was excited that I responded and engaged her. Really? Me?
So instead of talking about me, what I did was click on her profile. I learned as much as I could about her from her profile, visited her website, and got some information about her and what she does. I then proceeded to engage in a two-way conversation that enriched us both. I learned about her trade and the areas she enjoys and writes about! As she asked about me, I gave her information about the things that I’m involved with and all the stuff that I do.
Moral of the story? It’s not all about you! Remember to allow friends, family, fans, and anyone else that you engage with an opportunity to speak and share. If they don’t volunteer information, then ask them! Show them that you are interested in them too, and they may open up! It’s not all about you, bro!
I learned this a long ago from an adult video dancer gone rocker named Kayla Yu. When I and her spoke, I was trying badly to impress her! I was so nervous and wanted to “wow” her, so all I did was ramble on about me and what I had accomplished in life. I didn’t realize it, of course, but after a while, she said to me, “Angel, you might want to ask about what the other person does and give them a chance to speak too.”
Though quite embarrassing, that lesson proved very valuable. As such I make a conscious effort to involve other people in conversations, to get them to share as well as receive, because God knows I can give when it comes to talking! I mean, my website is called NYCTalking after all! With this though, I am also good at picking out the selfish person that only wishes to speak about themselves. Our conversations are usually short lived, and seldom revisited.
In life, I am experiencing little successes here and there, but I have promised myself that I would always remain grounded, real, humble and never become a dick wad! So, if the day ever comes that I become a self-centered, cocky, full of crap prick, you have permission to kick me in the nuts. However; please make sure that you let me know why you are kicking me in the nuts, or I may retaliate and knock you out! Hahah.
Growing Up Bronx