So there is a tiktok trend where older folks are filming themselves looking at a younger version of themselves via “the teen filter.”
Most of us play “The freshman” or “Forever young” while longingly looking at the image on the screen. Some have begun to sob while others smile at the “younger” them.
I saw one and decided to try it myself. Before I noticed all the other old folks crying, I felt extremely emotional and moved by looking at the filter and playing the song. Then as I saw others, I realized that it wasn’t just me, it was many of us reacting the same way, but why?
Well, I think it is a mixture of things. For one, that song, “The Freshman” stirs up strong feelings of nostalgia to a hard but good time in my life, my teens. Simultaneously, I remember all the things I could do back then, the way I looked, the way I lived, and I am filled with a mixture of happiness, sadness, yearning and even more nostalgia. I am also hit with the realization that I am actually old by the standard of what I’d think old was when I was younger myself.
I don’t begrudge myself getting old, I know that this is a privilege that is denied to many. But all the same, I do miss that healthy, strong young man that I once was. So yeah, let us cry, let us yearn, cause believe or not, I was in your shoes not that long ago. I remember teasing my friend for being 30, calling him too old to be clubbing with us. That was just yesterday when I was 23, and today I’m 45.
So before you shit on us for having a moment, know this, if you live long enough, you’ll be here in the blink of an eye.
Just a life long New Yorker sharing the journey through my lens. Please take note of a post’s date. The views I express here are subject to change and evolving as I grow and learn.