You ever said to yourself, “Damn, I wish I was there, I would have helped them.” I have said this many times and I like to believe that, if necessary, I would always help. But until that actual moment comes, one never really knows, right? Well, I do know. I have actually helped people in the past and am prepared to do so again.
A few weeks ago, my friend and I were walking to her car after having dinner and we saw a young couple arguing. This is NYC, so one has to understand that just because someone is being loud and screaming, it doesn’t mean there is any immediate danger. That’s just your typical NYC every day toxic energy.
In any case, this was a male and a female arguing, and the male was doing most of the screaming. He was a young, fit, seemingly strong young man. It was quite intimidating to watch. However, I learned long ago that you are not to interfere in other people’s personal business.
I live by that rule and unless things get out of hand, I mind my own business. I don’t like the screaming, but the lady stayed with him, was following him, and occasionally screamed back. Given the current parameters of the interaction, they are sort of on equal footing, and you have to mind your business. Odds are that she’d scream at you for interfering in their “private” discussion. I have experienced that as well. So, no actual violence, she’s staying? Mind your own business.
I kept an eye on them in case the guy did something to her. But they were just screaming at each other, and I didn’t see any physical violence. Again, life has taught me that you generally don’t want to interfere in other people’s business. If I saw the guy physically assaulting her then I would intervene, absent that, keep it pushing.
We saw three young kids coming out of the gym and apparently one of them said something to the guy who was already agitated and aggressive. He came after the kids and got right in their faces. At this point my friend and I were already in the car, but I undid my seatbelt and I asked her to standby until the situation was resolved.
The guy was talking with the kids initially in a very aggressive manner, but the kids realized that they were in danger and seemed apologetic for whatever it was they said. The guy was very intimidating and I’m sure they got a reality check about making snide remarks or interfering in other people’s business.
The girlfriend looked in my direction a few times, initially smiling in embarrassment, but then realizing that we were watching the entire thing unfold. I’m not sure if she realized that I was intentionally sticking around to make sure that her very scary boyfriend didn’t hurt those much smaller, younger guys. There were three of them, but this dude was much bigger than all of them.
By the end of it after we sat for a while, they were shaking hands and giving each other pound. I don’t really know what happened and I don’t know what was said. To be honest, I really did not want to be engaged in a physical altercation with this guy. I am an old, injured, non-confrontational type of person. However, I was prepared to address the situation if it escalated physical violence against either the boys or the girlfriend.
Once things settled down, I told my friend I think it’s time to go. A lot of people say I wish I was there, or they ask why didn’t anybody do something? But are you willing to be that person who does something though? Even if you fear for your safety or the possible consequences, would you step up and help those in need? I would, fear and all.
Just a life long New Yorker sharing the journey through my lens. Please take note of a post’s date. The views I express here are subject to change and evolving as I grow and learn.